06.08.08
Posted in Jack, Legal at 4:37 pm by Exick
Apparently, when things don’t go Jack’s way, he acts like a spoiled child. Shocking.
After finding him guilty of numerous (27) counts of professional douchebagitude, the Florida Bar recommended that our good buddy be disbarred for 10 years. When he attempted to read his long (and most assuredly rambling) rebuttal, he was prevented from doing so. He then did what any sane, rational 6-year-old does when told no: pouted and stomped out of the courtroom. It’s a fun day when Jack proves the title of this blog correct.
Wired’s Game|Life blog and Game Politics have more.
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05.30.08
Posted in GTA, Jack, Legal at 12:11 pm by Exick
It’s been a while since JTiaFD updated, but aside from the totally expected panties-twist that Jack got in over GTA IV, there hasn’t been much douchebaggy behavior from our friend. Yes, he’s gone back and forth with the Florida courts, but that’s really just to save his own miserable career and ass. But since that’s all there really is to talk about, might as well take a look at a recap of his legal troubles via Opposable Thumbs and GamePolitics.
Opposable Thumbs: Jack Thompson flails about, trying to save his law career
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10.23.07
Posted in Jack, Legal at 9:57 am by Exick
This time, it’s Best Buy. Apparently, using a credit card as age-verification isn’t good enough for Jack (even though it’s good enough for the FTC) so he’s going to attempt to drag Best Buy into court because their website will sell M-rated games to customers with credit cards. Thanks for continuing to waste everyone’s time, Jack. What would we do without our precious free time?
GP: Jack Thompson Says He Will File Best Buy Lawsuit Today
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09.28.07
Posted in GTA, Interviews, Jack, TakeTwo, Threats at 10:11 am by Exick
Once in a while, I feel like maybe being so blunt about the name of this blog isn’t helpful. After all, starting off with calling someone a fucking douchebag right in the title of it doesn’t exactly qualify as an olive branch. But then a day like today comes along and I stop feeling bad about it and wonder whether there are more colorful adjectives I could come up with.
New and strangely-titled game blog GameTwat has an exclusive interview with Old Man Jack up on their site today. It’s positively rife with so many examples of behavior that makes him truly despicable.
Name-calling (on GamePolitics): “GP really ought to stand for Godless Pissants”
Hypocrisy (on GP readers): “They care almost nothing about anything other than themselves and their petty concerns.”
General douchebaggery: “Welcome to A Clockwork Orange world, thanks to Sony, Nintendo, and the anti-Christ, Bill Gates”
Legal threats: “GamePolitics will be in court by then, so I shan’t bother them with the news”
For your convenience, I have extracted the various names that he calls people in the interview:
e-tard
lemming-like gamer robots
an industry lapdog
a tool of the industry
sycophantic readers
total moron
right at the amoeba brain level of intelligence
industry tools
twit
Godless Pissants
GamePolitics moron
anti-Christ
And now one last one: fucking douchebag. That one’s from me to you, Jack. I don’t feel bad about it anymore. Check out the full interview at GameTwat.
GameTwat: Exclusive: GameTwat Interviews Jack Thompson
GP’s response
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09.27.07
Posted in ESA, Jack, Microsoft at 10:12 am by Exick
So Jack and his faithful sidekick, DB Jr., are at it again. The target this time? Target. And Halo 3. Jack’s 15-year-old and future-ass-kicking-recipient son was able to procure a copy of the staggeringly popular Xbox 360 game Halo 3 from a Target store in Dadeland, Florida without providing proof of age. Well stop the fucking presses. Next you’ll be telling me that teenagers all over the country are somehow able to obtain beer and cigarettes despite laws set in place to prevent that. Shocking.
He refers to these things as “sting operations” which I find amusing. What’s so sting-ey about sitting in your Toyota Tercel jamming to Kenny G while other people do your work for you? Be sure to be on the look out for these two brilliant operatives in their next assignment Operation: Go Get Daddy Some Beef Jerky.
GP: Thompson & Son At It Again
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Posted in Jack, Legal at 6:08 am by Exick
No, really. And it’s not even the first time he’s pissed off the courts by submitting inappropriate material in an official filing, as was noted in the court’s response. This just shows Jack’s true genius as a Triple Threat: crazy, stupid, douchebag. The short version is this:
In Jack’s ongoing battle with the Florida Bar, he accuses them of being in cahoots with Norm Kent, another lawyer from Florida who is a rival of Jack’s. Norm publishes a website called National Gay News, which has links to other sites whereby one might find some hardcore porn. Well, Jack thought this was pertinent information, so he included it, along with actual samples of hardcore porn, in his filing. Truly, this is the work of a man who is mentally sound enough to continue practicing law and not at all unstable. It’s not all that surprising that Jack knows where to find gay porn considering his self-proclaimed evangelicalism and his opinions about gay people and gay marriage.
GP: Judge Spanks Thompson for Including Gay Porn with Court Filing
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09.21.07
Posted in Jack, Threats at 8:48 pm by Exick
Scott Johnson, creator of the excellent gamer-aimed webcomic ExtraLife is now on the receiving end of Jack’s loony behavior. You see, a couple days ago, Scott was inspired by Jack’s hubris to create a Photoshop contest wherein one would insert Jack Thompson’s glorious visage into various video game scenarios. Fun for kids of all ages, right? Well, Jack didn’t think so. This angered Jack. JACK SMASH! Or rather, JACK SEND IMMATURE EMAIL! He fires off an email to Scott telling him to cease and desist within an hour. Scott figures it’s just a reader being funny. Well, apparently he was wrong. The email did, in fact, come from the actual Lord of Douchebaggery Himself. Scott seems to be handling it diplomatically, which is probably the right way to go.
Extra Life: Jack Thompson actually gave me a “cease and desist”.
P.S. Yes, I am laughing my ass off, Jack.
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Posted in Jack, Legal, Microsoft, Threats at 6:03 pm by Exick
Just to be fair, Jack has decided to stop focusing all his energy on Rockstar and GTA for a while and go after a something possibly larger: Halo 3 and Microsoft. Yes our old pal has filed a complaint in a Florida Circuit Court against Microsoft and Best Buy alleging, among other things, that Microsoft is deliberately marketing Halo 3 to teens who can’t buy the game. Of course, what he hopes to accomplish is anyone’s guess.
GameSHOUT: Jack Thompson Files Lawsuit Over Halo 3
Update: Read the full text of the complaint over at GP (Word Doc)
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09.18.07
Posted in Jack at 8:54 pm by Exick
Specifically, Niko Bellic, the main character of the upcoming GTA IV. Apparently, our good buddy Jack thinks the lawyer being targeted in the first mission of the game is “clearly” supposed to be him and views this as a threat. As such, he has ordered (*snicker*) Rockstar/Take-Two to remove any reference to him or else. Or else what? Or else he’ll sue and fail miserably again as he has so many times before? Or else he might send his son into a game store and make him buy GTA?
Gaming Today: Jack Thompson Threatens to Block Release of GTA IV
GP: Jack Thompson Says GTA 4 Mission Target is Him; Threatens to Block Release
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09.15.07
Posted in ESA, Jack, TakeTwo at 7:51 am by Exick
Previously, it was Florida Attorney General Bill McCollum getting the call to be an irritant to Take 2 when Jack was no longer allowed to be one himself. This time, he’s bringing his own son into the mix. Yes, His Royal Doucheness has sent an email to Joystiq bragging about how he was able to send his 15-year-old son into Best Buy and have him purchase a copy of BioShock, which is rated M.
Congratulations dumbass, you’ve proven something that everyone, including the ESRB, already knows: the system isn’t perfect. Guess what else? Your son has also probably seen big naked tits and heard foul language thanks to other imperfect systems. You can’t protect them forever, Jack. Eventually they grow up and kill you in your sleep leave the nest. One thing you have guaranteed, however, is that your son will be first in line at school to get his ass kicked for being a narc.
Joystiq: Thompson sends own son on personal sting operation against Best Buy
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